Miscellaneous

I miss my Fifi *sniffle* and she hasn't even left yet!!!
I drove her to her dads (old R) this evening cos I live 45 mins from the airport and he is only 10 minutes away from it. She has to be up about 4:30 am, check in is an hour before her flight which is at 6:30 am to Mel.bou.rne. Ergo - we would have been up about 3:30 so, as it is going to be a looooong day for her without losing another hours sleep. She normally sleeps - when not at college - until 9:00 am or longer if I don't wake her!!!
And I really don't do airports well - it is really embarrassing to see a 50 + male sniffling with tears in his eyes and unable to speak without choking!!! Anybody mentions this again they are so in trouble........
Therefore Dad (old RRRRR) is having to do the airport bit......

Changing the subject before I fall into a sobbing heap.....

Pork crackly - it may also be known as fried pork rind/fat/skin. Normally here in oz it is the outer skin with an underlying layer of fat found on a pork shoulder roast or rib rack. The trick is to cook the roast so its nice and tender and juicy but the outer skin is crisp and crackly - ergo the name. I either almost cremate the roast to achieve this result or the "crackly" is so rubbery and chewy you could clad tennis balls in it and produce a super tennis Ball!!! Perfect for serving ( an ace in tennis at least).
I've tried slicing it off and cooking it separately but still manage to destroy it!! OK - I know I'm not the worlds greatest cook ( I'm the only person ever - and I mean in recorded history - to fail the practical aspect of food science at uni!!!! I was such a miserable cook the lecturer a) almost resigned when told I had to repeat the prac... and b) they told me just to do the book and - please - no need to attend class! This is not an exaggeration - Old R can verify this!!)
Since that time - about 10 years ago - my cooking skills have improved dramatically - well they could hardly have got worse! But I still have a way to go yet.
If anyone has an answer to the pork problem please let me know...... so Andrea - if you have a recipe i'd be delighted to have it.. :-)

As I had a quiet Christmas I don't have any pics to post, and it looks like New Year will be the same which - at my age - I'm happy for it to be that way. Instead I'll post some more pics of my piece of geography tomorrow - well maybe lol...
Night all, love you girls and a particular love you to Fifi - *howl* - *sob* - *sniffle*

For FIFI

Ok - where to start?
Niece no.1 has publicly acknowledged a few small things I have done for her recently - thanks sweet. I help where I can and its the way I've always been - maybe not in big ways but......

I'm not alone in helping or doing things for others for just a thank you by way of reward......

Niece no.3 - Fifi by name (or the vague/ dippy/ditzy/zany/eccentric/arty one) can be generous to a fault. She has been known to spend lots of money feeding her college friends during lunch, buying bits and pieces for our larder etc.
But the most amazingly generous thing she has done is to pay 50% of niece no.2's first car.... and then when Niece 2 buys a better car she has offered (and is paying) half the payments on this car!!!! Half of $7500!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

THIS KID IS AMAZING

Your generosity, your smile, your selflessness is not un-noticed. Thank you Fifi - you are a wonderful carefree selfless person - please don't ever change......

I'm posting this cos, as I've stated in a previous post, we never seem to say how much we appreciate or say what others mean to us, or what they do for us - so thank you Fifi - we love you....

(ok - somebody please get me the tissues.......)

Moving right along (sniffle).
Christmas was quiet. I got up Christmas morn and started cleaning the kitchen, cooking the meal and generally rushing around. The Girls ( The Nieces) arrived about 11 am along with their dad (old R). He promptly started helping with the cooking cos by this time I was looking (and feeling ) a little frayed. (ok - so I always look a little frayed....) Dinner went of without a hitch - except the pork crackly - looked, and felt, like old car innertube by the time we finished with it so it didn't get served. (any suggestions for cooking pork crackly?)
The afternoon was spent lazing around and veging - I'm reeeaaaly good at that)

So without further ado - happy new year to one and all....

Ships

Its been a bit coincidental.
Yesterday for some reason I decided to try doing an online search for my old ship that I sailed on when I was 16 - 17. I got lucky and found a website that gave her history.
Origionally the old girl was built in Ho.ba.rt in 1891 as a 2 masted ketch. Then converted to a 3 masted schooner. Sometime in the early 20th century she was sold to a South Au.str.alian Shipping company. About 1950 she was steel plated. Eventually in the early 1960's she found her way to Lau.nces.ton where, in 1973 I signed on as a 16 yr old deckboy and found myself in the toughest, and most dangerous, job I've ever had.

She was used on the ba.ss str.ait island cargo trade, ferrying general cargo and livestock between Tas.mania and the islands through one of the roughest stretches of water anywhere in the world. The cargo handling techniques were still 1800 hundreds with a crew of near cut throats and pirates - in other words - bloody tough men.

And - yes we did still use the sails.........

I survived 18 months of this - and I still can't get the salt outa my system.....

Here is a pic of a beautiful old lady of the sea.....

The coincidental part is today I was waiting in line at an agency when I heard another man called by his name - I turned and there was one of my old shipmates - after 35 years!!!! We spent the next half hour catching up, we parted with an arrangement to meet and have a few drinks to the memory of departed crew....

Not Again!!!!!

I don't believe this!!
Today at work I removed the front suspension from a car to replace the coil springs. This is a simple process - a real no brainer but.........

To replace the old springs they need to be compressed with a special tool cos these springs are powerful - they hold the front of the car up. Everything went ok until I had the springs of the strut then disaster!!!! I was holding the spring in my left hand and the compressor came of and, literally, the spring exploded free - crushing my thumb in the process!!!! Yep - you guessed it - the same thumb I tried to drill!!!!

I thought it hurt when I drilled it but nothing like the pain I felt today!!! The (expletive deleted) thumb is throbbing like crazy - its now 10:00 pm and I hurt it at about 12:30 this avo.
Another example of complacency when working with potentially dangerous tools. The worst part is I've had too many painkillers to even think about scotch!!
I am going to fit out a padded room and stay there........

On a lighter note - Niece no. 3's blog - it is sooooo difficult to be stern with her when - as a youth - I did many of the things she is doing. I can't be that big a hypocrit.
And I'm finding it difficult to write something amusing when my thumb is pulverised - and throbbing like crazy......... lots of sympathy needed here.......

The upside to the day was the young guy who owned the car. A really happy go lucky 27 yr old who looked more like 20 - Nieces 2 and 3 met him and were absolutely smitten!! I was standing around in agony - hoping the nieces would be appropriately sympathetic - and all they could do was stand there drooling over this (supposed) adonis!!! "I'm badly injured" I whined. "Poor uncy" was the very casual response. And straight back to staring and drooling!! Hmph.....
Just because he had dark hair, dark eyes, a brilliant smile and friendly personality......... so what!? I got grey hair, blue eyes, wrinkles and middle age spread - beat that punk!!!!! Oh - and I have a spirited personality!!! (alcohol spirits that is...)

Love you Girls - uncy is going to bed to have a good cry.........

P.S. note to self - avoid using left hand....
P.P.S. 2nd note to self - if it looks vaguely dangerous - get somebody else to do it......
P.P.P.S. 3rd note to self - do not introduce my nieces to (supposedly) good looking young men - they lose all pretense at coherent thought.....

Outnumbered

I'm not happy!! The ex called - needs her bathroom vanity fixing so, like the hero I am, I rocked on up to fix it. No problems there - just the usual annoying issues with plumbing connections that won't stop dripping etc.

Anyways, while I'm working away nieces 2 and 3 arrive. So far so good. The the ex's eldest daughter arrives. Hmmmmm - the numbers are becoming stacked against me.

Then out of nowhere the subject of my beard crops up. I like my scraggly goatee - it matches my scraggly hair and overall weather beaten appearance. It seems that none of the females in my life (or for that matter - that were in my life) like my facial hair! Ergo - I somehow found myself in a chair with a towel around my neck (Just loose enough to maintain vital organs - ie I could just breathe) and a set of hair clippers being waived in my face! (the ex's eldest daughter is a hairdresser).

And it didn't stop there - I not only lost the goatee ( only a three week growth left) I also had the shortest of short back and sides (just a millimetre longer than a crew cut). All four females were absolutely delighted with the end result - the Nieces cos the beard was gone ( they hate 'em), the former step daughter cos she finally could get revenge on me for whatever, and the ex? Hmmmm not sure what she got out of it!? She kept commenting on how I look so much better after the haircut etc - how grey hair suits me!! I am seriously getting worried! Been there, done that and don't want to do it again (get your filthy minds outa the gutter!!!!!!). Siberia is looking reeeeaaaaly good at the moment!

For those in my inner circle of friends - check out my face book - if you dare......

Love you Oogie, Mogsy, Fifi and Boop.......

Philosophy

On Friday 12th of December 2008 at 2:00 pm (approx.) a young man lost his life. A tragedy - a tragedy that is repeated so often - daily, hourly and maybe every second somewhere in the world. His poor family...... hopefully there is something, some faith that they can call on. My heart goes out to them.

One thing that has struck me - and not for the first time - how people will write and say things positive about the deceased. I DO NOT criticise this - but I personally feel the world would be so much better if we said these things while the person was still alive.

Niece no. 1 posted some days ago her appreciation of myself - I cannot begin to describe the emotions, of my actions being appreciated over the years. I did what i did for love - not rewards.

Tell people of your appreciation of them - tell it as if the person has just died and you were venting your grief and loss - tell them before its too bloody late........ I know what its like not to say what I felt to people I love before I lost them. Please world - say it now - use the phone, use email, say it in person - say what you really feel about that person.

Joshy G's parents are wishing they had said more just now..........


I love you girls..............................................................................

Geography

Its been a while but..... lots of excuses etc.

Thank you Oogie..... its appreciated.

Onto the local geography. I'm actually going to post some pics of my patch - nothing spectacular to start but I promise to try and get some really good pics of my region - the T.ama.r V.all.ey.
First one is a pic from my gate looking almost due north. The second one is looking at Auckl.and with - in the far far distance - the usa. (if you squint you may just be able to see it). The third pic is looking due south from my gate and the fourth is down my drive towards my house. the last one is a part view of the (cough) mansion. Click on the pics for an enlarged view - thats if you want to of course, which you may not, and thats ok too. But it would be really cool if you did.......

DAMN - ok read the pics from bottom to top - for some reason they posted in reverse order and I'm too lazy to fix it - hee hee.

More later - trying to clean up before the aged care assessors arrive to check over the granny from hell.

Teddy Bears part 2

Further to my post about teddy bears - "The Architect" and myself have had a big debate about them - I think teddy bears DO have feelings! "The Architect" claims they dont! She thinks that this aging hippy/grey haired geriatric is loopy and must have indulged in certain herbs too much in the dim distant past or too much whiskey in the hazy present!
Two points there - I can't stand the smell of a certain herb - ergo - never indulged, and as to the alcohol based substance - weeeeelllllll.
Bottom line - me and my teddy have a really great rapport and we have some inredibly deep and meaningful conversations when the bottle is about half empty.

If anybody made any sense of the previous post - GET OF THE DRUGS - or then again, maybe you need 'em.......

GRASS

I spent some time in the garden today watching the grass grow cos I still haven't fixed the mower.

I also moved some of my pine seedlings into larger pots and my brown thumb struck! By this avo some had already wilted! Maybe if I went around digging up weeds and transplanting they would die. With my luck the sods would thrive.

The wildlife is also thriving too - I have a possum that likes to take nocturnal hikes across my roof and I'm sure the mongrel is learning to tapdance - in hobnail boots! But I did have a good laugh at its expense....
The back half of my house has an attic section above with the roof at a 45 degree angle - so very steep. Laying in bed one night i could hear the damn possum walking along the roof ridge with a friend. Suddenly 1st possum slips of ridge and I hear his toenails trying to dig into the steel roof - screeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeech - pause - thud!!! as he fell from the eaves. Two minutes later 2nd possum does the same thing!!! screeeeeeeeeeech - pause - thud!!! I couldn't sleep - I was curled into a ball howling with laughter!! And its all ok - the possums are fine and weren't injured - they often fall outa trees so they land like cats except heavier.

And a bird has nested in the top of the kitchen flue and its babies spend their days pecking at it. The tapping echoes through the kitchen and its driving me dippy (dippier). An echidna seems to enjoy harrassing my dog (has visited twice now in a week) and I have a colony of bats living in my workshop roof. They are there every year just before halloween - how cool is that!?

Gazillions of wallabies - damn dog is on first name basis with 'em, invites the lot round to his water dish. I usually have a couple of kookaburras but they haven't rocked up yet.

The thumb is healing nicely - I've been having fun grossing out anybody I can pin down with the an explicit explanation (along with screwdriver bit) of how I achieved my injury!! I eventually went to the doctor after a lot of nagging by every female i know to get a tetanus shot. I haven't had one in more than 25 years so...... The damn shot hurt!!! The "Vague One" (niece 3) found the whole thing amusing and facinating. The doc looked at the wound and I could see he was thinking ( Oh joy - stitches!!) But the injury was a day old and no way was I having them!! So just a clean and a dressing later.... The nurse was cute tho..... ;-}

Talking of stitches - Many years ago I managed to get a deep cut on my foot from a broken bottle in a creek. It required three stitches but the doc gave me FIVE jabs of local anaesthetic!! Where the hell was the sense in that!?

I can't think of any other news atm so I'll finish here. I checked out a comment on no. 3's blog from a photog guy inU.S. - cool idea so I may from time to time publish scenery pics of my patch of geography. Most oz wildlife is nocturnal so, unless I spend all night wandering around in the dark with a cam there wont be much animal stuff. Also try explaining to the local law what you are doing with a cam at night in suburbia..... "So sir - you are saying that there just happened to be an open bedroom window in line with your shot....?" yeah right.....

take care all - and smile.....

One of Those Days

I shouldn't have got out of bed.

I was using a cordless drill while working away on the new kitchen extension, trying to drive screws into a hard piece of timber - leaning on the drill when the screw tipped over and the driver bit buried itself in my thumb right alongside the thumbnail while spinning at high speed!!! It tore out a nice chunk of meat and muscle almost through to the front of the thumb. Well close enough that it left a star shaped bruise on the INSIDE of the bottom of my thumb!!!

My usual command of english deserted me and I simply resorted to the most basic of expletives - only 3 or 4 of 'em but repeated infinitum. Its amazing how rapidly intelligence gives way to instinct - one ceases to be eloquent or for that matter, even coherent. Apparently i managed to blend my entire expletive vocabulary into one word and then mashed it up - almost as badly as my thumb!

So after a fair amount of blood I went to the local pharmacy (not the doctor - I do want to live) and obtained some suitable dressings and antiseptic and administered to my mutilated (and slightly smaller) thumb.

Upon my return to my humble (and that is an optimistic description) abode I managed to walk head first into the mirror of my truck!! I now have a bolt shaped depression in my forehead!!

I am spending the rest of today in bed with a bottle of scotch - and I aint gonna move!! Bad luck is supposed to come in three's - oh god - what next!!?? I've tied foam to the toilet bowl so I shouldn't get hurt there. I'll crawl around the house so I can't trip. (The crawling may also be an after effect of the scotch) and I just may sleep on the floor too - just to be sure.

And I want heaps of sympathy from the wider world.....

Oh - and as an added bonus I may publish a pic later of the screwwdriver bit all clogged up with meat from my thumb!

I'm a sick puppy hee hee........

Teddy Bears

A few months before niece no. 1 (the planner) left for NZ, she bought a teddy bear and when she got it home discovered the poor thing had a club foot! She gave it to me cos I took pity on the poor thing. (How do you take pity on an inanimate object?!) I am probably the only middle aged male with a teddy on his bed!

Ok - I know what's coming! Yes I do know that there are specialist doctors that can help and it all stems back to my mother taking my dummy (for those in the U.S. - a pacifier) away too soon! (I was only 21!)

I've just been telling my other nieces about the mischief I got into as a kid. My older brother was usually the butt of these pranks. ie - putting a firecracker under his car seat whilst he was sitting in it and looking the other way! He would come after me and I would run to dad. Another time I loosened his bike pedals - that had hilarious results. The rope across the door of our shared bedroom. The fire cracker I threw into the shed while he was in there and the ensuing yells, screams and abuse. I learned to be an olympic sprinter and always had a weather eye out for dad - I then knew when he wasn't looking and where to run to find him for protection. The rubber snake I tossed into the old outhouse while bro was taking care of business and the ensuing streak! He covered all of ten yards with his trousers around his ankles before he fell!

I'll have to post some more of these anecdotes of a country childhood one day. I wasn't a very nice younger brother! But boy did I have fun!

Its a bit unfortunate that the same mischief carried into adulthood. I once short sheeted the nuptial bed - that may partially explain why she is now my ex.......

There were never any firecrackers there - just lots of fireworks! Particularly with my brand of humour.
Thats all for now - I should start on the kitchen renovations but thats another saga.........

Love and Lust

I’m in love. I saw her picture on Saturday. Instant attraction. I phoned up and arranged to meet on Tuesday morning. I arrived in Hobart about 9.00 am and found her at the waterfront as arranged. She was beautiful, elegant and classy. Oh certainly she looked a little careworn but nothing a makeover and some cosmetics wouldn’t fix. She looked damn fine from where I first saw her. A little older than me but I couldn’t care less. She is absolutely gorgeous.
Then we got up close and personal – oh god – my heart was a flutter! I truly thought romance was dead but I was wrong. We jelled, we are made for each other, we have waited a lifetime to meet and finally I have found my soul mate.
We spent about an hour together and in that time my feelings strengthened. I had the opportunity to touch her and then caress her!! I think I pushed all the right buttons cos in moments she was turned on and purring.
Oh god!!! Long dormant feelings were aroused!
Dreams of long summer nights spent in her embrace, gently rocking in some quiet space in isolated bays. The pleasure we could derive in each others company, travelling the world, seeing strange shores.
But alas my heart was to be broken before we could really start. She is not to be mine. She has other suitors and her pleasure shall be theirs. I am consumed with jealousy at the thought of another’s hands touching her, caressing her, being in her embrace. It is so soul destroying, pain beyond belief. To drive away without her was unbearable. The long drive home from Hobart was the longest and saddest I have endured in a long time.
If only I had $25,000 she could be mine! A 56 ft beauty, built like a brick dunny, a ship to be proud of……. SOB – I want her……..

Talent

I am blessed by four very talented nieces - Fi - you are one of the best because of your video of Will. Becbec - I bet you are impressed by the video. Be Proud.........

work

That is a horrible word. Its strange really - we do all sorts of stuff at home which we are content to do (and for pleasure or improve our living environment) but the moment we do the same sort of stuff for payment it becomes drudgery! Human nature is weird. (that appears to be my word of the moment......hmmmm).
I've been at (shudder) work today. I only work casually just for the extras but its still a pain. Plus I sometimes enjoy the company of other males as my life is full of females.
Its been a long day cos I was up at 5 am, of to spend the morning in town with niece no. 2 as its her birthday. Then of to work at the local garage from 10:30 am until after 7 pm - a loooooong day. I finally got home to find niece no. 3 on my computer (MY BABY) and it takes forever to move her from it. All the heavy sighs, hints, suggestions etc have no effect. As has already been said she is vague and unfocussed or it may be a case of selective deafness.

Niece no. 1 needs to see a dr. I need all her blogger friends, associates and anybody else to nag her into getting it organised. She never seems to do it despite the obvious need.

One of the joys of having three teenage girls in the same house is their ability to be all caring and cuddly one minute and the next Baghdad seems positively peaceful! All sweetness then suddenly snapping and snarling then straight back to harmony!! Go figure.....
Life in this house is soooo unpredictable.
I've rambled about nothing so I'll stop here - night all and love you girls....... sleep tight......

Dinner

Tonight I went to my ex's house for dinner - how totally weird is that?! No - before anyone thinks anything, nothing untoward happened! We have been apart for 10 years now and we are just good friends. And I prefer it that way!
Niece no.1 - who I haven't mentioned yet - thinks its un-cool (uncle - get it? oh dear......) for me to hang out with the ex. Sorry sweet - old fogies do tend to be a bit weird - I just make a career of it.

Now niece no.1 is a mummy to the cutest little boy, has all these plans for him, her sisters and me - ummmm - not happeneing sweet! So she shall be known as "the planner". Hmmm - I'll work on a better title for her. I will elaborate more about this one's foibles in future posts - look out sweet - all your dirty washing will be aired hee hee.

Another example of "the architect" in action - wants a tv bracket mounted on a sloping ceiling!? Oh boy........

Its getting late and I'm getting tired so this will have to do for tonight. Love you all. Sleep tight.....

Houses

Inane ramble no.1 - I own what could best be described as a "renovators delight". Currently I'm in the process of redecorating (rebuilding) an attic bedroom for niece no.2. What a nightmare! Oh the building etc is going ok but anybody that has attempted to moderate the excesses of a 19 yr old female wannabe architect will understand the nightmare part!
There is just no way a 3 foot square mirror that weighs a ton (well - heaps anyway) can be mounted on a sloping ceiling in such a way to facillitate doing ones make-up or admire the new dress! Miss architect has made some utterly impractical suggestions to date. I think she should do engineering and then study architecture - lol.

A bit about my - ummmm - totally different household. I'm an immature adult male of an age where one doesnt talk about age - hmmmm - draw your own conclusions.
Other denizens of the pit include an 80 something grandmother who could have been Hitler's mentor.
A 19 year old niece (no. 2) - henceforth known as "the architect".
A 17 year old niece (no. 3) - to be known as "miss vague" or sometimes as "miss eccentric" or "the dreamer".
A 15 year old niece (no. 4) - known as "baby momma" for reasons that will become apparent as time progresses.
Other transient or semi-permanent residents inlude too many dogs, an assortment of rats and mice, itinerant possums (they take up casual residence in the eaves), inbred wallabies, rabbits by the dozen and every damn bird of every type in T.asm.ania nesting in any damn nook or cranny they can find! (Its spring time here and the (expletive deleted) horrors make one helluva racket scrabbling and twittering starting at dawn!!).
Oh - and we all live in a dilapidated run down old house in the country.......... And the kitchen roof leaks in heavy rain!
I-AM-STARK-STARING-MAD........ sob........

Hi world. This my second attempt at a blog. In the days or weeks that follow you - the reader - will be exposed to the ramblings of a weird mind. I will on occasion be nice and on other occasions I will do my best to insult, demoralise or otherwise annoy the hell out of whomever irks me at the time. Or I might just ramble on about sod all. Thats all for now......